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Stop Stressing About Your Birthday

By: Elianna Rothstein

Girl at Dinner Table

Every year, we eagerly anticipate the special date of our birth. Countless hours are spent—and sometimes tears are shed—while planning the perfect day. I’m a birthday stress victim too. Of course, I want to enjoy a lovely day with family and friends, celebrating life with the people and things I cherish. I truly believe it’s important to honor this special day, but I also think it’s not worth stressing over. So this year, as my birthday approaches, I want to be more mindful of avoiding the birthday blues.


“Birthday depression” can lead to intense negative feelings in the weeks and days leading up to—and on—your birthday. For some, birthdays can bring up old or sad memories, perhaps involving loved ones who aren’t there anymore to celebrate. Others may feel stressed about planning the perfect day or anxious about social expectations and the pressure of growing up. Whatever the cause, here are five things to keep in mind for your birthday.


Set Realistic Expectations


Let’s be real, your birthday might not be perfect. There may be unexpected weather or you might have school on your birthday. Regardless, instead of aiming for the "perfect" day, focus on something special to celebrate YOU and what would genuinely make you happy. Whether it's a quiet day at home, a small gathering, or a fun outing with friends, tailor your celebration to your preferences.


Celebrate Your Way, Not Theirs


I don’t know who needs to hear this, but your birthday is for you—no one else. It’s not for your Instagram followers to see or for others to judge how you celebrate. And it’s definitely not for your family or friends to critique. If you want to relax at home, do it. If you feel like going on a weekend vacation, go for it. The point is, don’t worry about meeting social expectations for how "good" your birthday plans are. The only thing that matters is whether you are enjoying it.


Communication is Key


Here’s the thing: unfortunately, no one can read your mind. That means you need to communicate your birthday wishes and needs to your friends and family. If you don’t, your expectations might go unmet. And trust me, it’s totally okay—at least for one day—to ask for what you want and let others know how you’d like them to show up for you on your special day.


Practice Gratitude


Last but most definitely not least, reflect on the positive aspects of your life and what's important to you. Think about your past year and everything you accomplished and got to experience. It might sound a little cheesy, but try keeping a gratitude journal in the days leading up to your birthday. Just jot down a few things you’re thankful for each day. Trust me, it’s a game-changer for shifting your mindset toward positivity—and who doesn’t want a little more of that as their birthday rolls around? Remember, positivity and gratitude are scientifically good for you.



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